Surfing the Inner N8

Carolyn has a kindergarten student who has more personality in his little body than most adults I know combined. For the sake of privacy I’ll call him “Milton.” So here’s my list of the Top 10 Funny Milton Comments:

(10) Carolyn was teaching the kids about money. When she explained that George Washington was on the quarter, the kids asked if he was the president. She told them he died a long time ago. Then she showed them the eagle on the other side of the quarter. Milton cautiously inquired: “Is it dead?”

(9) One of Carolyn’s shirts is really soft and fuzzy. Recently when she wore it to school, Milton nuzzled up against her and said, “You’re comfy.”

(8) Some students were having a theological discussion (which in itself would be worth sharing here). Milton chimed in: “In my church, we stomp the devil on his head!”

(7) The teaching assistant had the hiccups one afternoon. Milton asked her: “Then why did you come to school today?”

(6) I don’t know why they would give the word “dam” to kindergarten students for a spelling word, but nevertheless, that was the case. Carolyn drew a picture for all the spelling words, and when Milton saw the picture of a dam, he asked what it was. “A dam,” she told him. His eyes got real big with shock and he said, “That’s a bad word–my daddy says that word!”

(5) After about a month of school–and a month of behavior problems–Milton asked Carolyn: “Did I pick this class?”

(4) On Fun Friday all the kids who haven’t gotten in trouble during the week get to pick a prize out of the treasure box. Milton had behaved horribly all week long, and when treasure box time rolled around, he shyly presented his case to Carolyn: “I’ve been a little bit good.”

(3) The kids had an assignment: draw a picture of your favorite way to travel.  Milton drew a fancy vehicle with lots of color and detail and a big engine.  Carolyn looked at him and asked, “What’s your favorite way to travel?”  Milton’s reply: “In a souped-up car.”

(2) Not long ago during school, Milton asked Carolyn: “Where do you work?”

And my very favorite…

(1) At Christmas time, Carolyn had a dilemma: she didn’t want to inundate the kids with songs about Santa and Rudolph, but being at a public school, she also couldn’t play music with Christian words.  So she found a good middle ground: she played Christian Christmas songs, but instrumental versions.  After an afternoon of listening to instrumental songs that he recognized, Milton was puzzled and asked: “Why are we listening to karaoke?”